75% Responsible

Yesterday, I was chatting on my balcony with one of my favourite people on earth. He was telling me about his latest career move and I sat there with my jaw hanging so low and slack a kitten could have used my mouth as a swing - gaping at the absolute coolness of his decision. He was going to go have the exact job in the exact place that I have dreamt would be the coolest job imaginable since I was probably eleven. So, I said to him, "You're living the dream, Man!"

And he said something like the following back to me, "No, I'm a friggin' idiot." Then he told me all the irresponsible things he'd been doing lately - all career choices - about him living on the road with his friends and just getting what jobs they could find on a temporary basis just to keep them rolling (that's why we've got a powerpuff girl style Kenshin today - little rurouni - and again I don't know who did this, but it's so cute!). And that now, he's doing my dream job, but he feels like he should behaving more responsibly. He said, "You see, I'm probably about 60% the fun guy who just wants to go do these weird fun things, but then I'm 40% the responsible guy who hangs out in my head just enough to spoil the fun guy's time."

So, I got to thinking about this, and without a doubt I am 75% responsible and only about 25% fun. When in a tight pinch, the responsible one takes over completely and I might not get a glimpse of the fun me for so long that I forget she's there. Maybe that makes me more responsible than 75%, but I can't help it. I believe in living a responsible, respectable life, but I dream of going ronin and doing whatever comes into my silly head. But, I know that wouldn't get me where I want to be, so the responsible self always wins. Always. There is no contest. But just for kicks and giggles, I've decided to write three positive things about each side of me.

Responsible Self

1. Writes
2. Creates
3. Throws things away
   

Fun Self

1. Shops
2. Dances to angry music
   
3. Wears wigs

I should probably use this list as a guide for my next couple posts. There's a lot to talk about with just those six things. Anyway, I'd like to see myself be funner, but my responsible side is what gets things done and I suppose I really am a bureaucrat at heart. What am I saying? Of course, I'm a bureaucrat at heart and I have the stubborn attitude to go with it.

So, I'll never go ronin. I'll still get mad at guests for leaving the toilet seat up. I'll still drive the speed limit, even when I'm late. I'll still buy white bras and still not wear the orange stud choker I bought. That's right! And I'll still try my best to behave appropriately and properly, like a little lady who remembers to cross her ankles when she's sitting.

But, trust me, I'll never be able to break the habit of belting out 'Bloody Hell!' when something really pisses me off.

Ja ne!