The 'Other' Woman

Lately I was listening to a song on the radio about a girl who is having an affair with a man who's already taken. I'm not sure if normal people put this much thought into lame songs they hear on the radio while they're commuting, but I was thinking about this one. What kind of a girl would put with with being second? I came up with some possible reasons.

1. They don't have enough self-respect to be someone's first and only love.
2. They love the guy so much that they can't leave a relationship with him alone, even if they are hurting an innocent person.
3. They are turned on by the thrill of not getting caught.
4. They are turned on by the idea of hurting his girlfriend/wife.

I thought of a couple more besides this, but I couldn't get my reaction to this out of my head. Of course, this was my thought pattern back in the day when I was dating.

If he was dating someone else or even had feelings for someone else and didn't want to date me when I offered, I would have been totally confused. I absolutely would not have understood a guy wanting to be with someone else besides me. I would have been staring at him wondering exactly how brain damaged a guy would have to be to escape being completely smitten with me.

Now that I'm older, I realize that I made lots of mistakes while dating. One of my boyfriends I used to elbow. Yeah, I don't think he liked that very much. Another one, I wouldn't ask him to dance when we went dancing even though he told me that that sort of thing turned him on - a girl being forward enough to ask for what she wanted (I just didn't operate that way back then). There was another one that I refused to tell the real reason why I was breaking up with him. If I had told him, he probably could have worked on it and we wouldn't have broken up. But, there weren't very many of my boyfriends that I really liked. I usually only consented to be someone's girlfriend when I was feeling emotionally unstable and needed a little pick-me-up. Sad eh?

But today I'm going to share some pearls to help you single gals catch or hang onto your man. A couple rules that you absolutely MUST not do while in the presence of a guy you like.

1. Do not bash or criticize other girls. This makes them look interesting and misunderstood, and it makes you look jealous and petty. I don't know how many guys who have dated me have told me that they heard some girl complain about me. It usually gets their interest.
2. Do not praise other guys for anything. This makes it look like you have eyes for men other than them - they don't like this either.
3. Don't kill spiders. Don't scream either. Just calmly and a little ashamedly go ask him to take care of it for you. This will make him feel tough by doing almost nothing.

That's enough for now - though I know more. So much more.