What the ...?

MAJOR SPOILER ALERT!

So, as I mentioned two posts back, I've been reading Stephenie Meyer's vampire series. I really liked the second book 'New Moon'. I thought it was charming, and I honestly can't think of a way to criticize it. It was lovely.

However, I wasn't a fan of book three 'Eclipse'. Really ... not a fan. For starters, Bella has the scent of a strange vampire in her room when an unknown vamp sneaks into her room and steals some of her clothes. I'm sitting there thinking, 'Okay, so Victoria has figured out that she can't get through the werewolves herself, so now she's made a new vampire to sneak in and get Bella's clothes, so she can attack Bella with multiple new vamps'. It's easy - you're a vamp - make your own army - send them after her - kill them all when you're done.

By the time Bella has figured this out and is telling everyone what's happened - Edward is surprised. WHY? Why is he surprised? Is it possible that Edward knows less about vampire fiction than I do? I didn't care that Bella hadn't figured it out, but I was unhappy that Edward lost so many points so quickly. Isn't he supposed to be smarter than that? Faster than that? I thought he was keeping it from her on purpose.

I'm being a brat. It's just a major disappointment to me that the major plot twist was not much of a twist. I was also not surprised when Jane shows up at the end. I thought she might have been in on it with Victoria because she didn't want Bella to become the sort of vampire who would show her up. I half expected Jane to take a shot at Bella ... and was most disappointed when she did not.

Lastly, what the crap is with that over inflated love triangle? You know what I was expecting? I was expecting Bella to get to be really close friends with Angela (so that she couldn't imagine friendship without her) and then have Jacob imprint on Angela, so that Bella would have to give both of them up if she became a vampire. Much more of a sacrifice, see?

Anyway, I wasn't happy with all the fluff at the end. I mean, I know teenage girls and they like to be torn between two guys and it's even better if the two guys want to fight over her, but ... I really didn't like the way it was played. Especially that conversation of Edward and Jacob's in the tent while Bella is supposed to be asleep. I got so much crap over my scene in 'Mystic Wings' when Van is pacing by the pool and talking to himself. I hate to say this, but I think that would be far more likely than two guys actively confiding in each other - especially when Edward is watching Jacob and Bella cuddle in the sleeping bag (blanket scenario). That really makes Edward seem sick - like he wouldn't mind a three-some or something. It was especially wrong since Edward is supposed to be painted like the real old-school, moral, virtuous -- wanting to wait until they get married -- kind of guy. Which is all stuff I personally agree with. I'm a bag and and half, but I believe that if someone wants you to trust them enough to have sex with them - then they should have no trouble signing on the dotted line (wedding certificate) saying that whatever happens in this life - you'll go through it together. But Edward putting up with it and basically just saying he's jealous and leaving it at that? There had to be a better solution - like a fight scene. Come on ... there could have been another fight scene.

(Side note: I think Stephenie is onto something with Jacob and Edward's conversation. When you write a fic for girls, it's not just about what would actually happen, but it's about all the things girls wish guys would think, but since we're stuck in the first person - she has to have Bella hear it. I just think what she did do was a little over the top.)

I think Edward looked like such a pansy because she's trying to make Jacob and Edward equally appealing so that there is a reasonable conflict. So, in order to make Jacob look better she's got to take Edward down a few pegs. HOWEVER! By the end, I couldn't remember why Bella was going back to Edward. He didn't do anything remotely endearing towards the end.

And ONE MORE THING! Where was the BLOOD? Where was the VICIOUSNESS! Where was the scary, confident, demon like, passionate, blood pumping scene where Edward kills Victoria? Edward was no different during that fight than he was answering a question in bio class back at the school. I was expecting ravishing, brutal, majestic, magical, worth dying over beauty that would make Edward seem like four times better than Jacob and instead ... there was no blood. Bella scratched her arm ... wow ... I am overpowered. Seriously ... I know that I'm always thinking of Louis from 'Interview with the Vampire', but when Claudia dies, he goes to the theater (and in the book he thinks that Lestat is there too, because he helped Armand kill Claudia) with a scythe just before dawn and murders the lot of them - BOOM! He doesn't even expect to live - he doesn't even care. Edward looks like a sissy for his plans in 'New Moon' compared (when he thinks Bella is dead), doesn't he? He was just going to step out in the noon day sun and let everyone see him. I shouldn't complain - I liked 'New Moon', but now I'm not happy with Bella. But there's lovely Louis for all you girls out there.

Okay, I'm done. And a little grouchy still. It wasn't as bad as all that. I'm just mad because I care. I'm not allowed to read Anne Rice anymore because I get too into it. Way too into it!

I went to Stephenie Meyer's official website and saw that they are making a movie. I liked the actors they chose, except that I'm sort hoping that if they make a screenplay for 'eclipse' that the fluff will get sifted out in favour of more violence, but I doubt it. These days explicit sex scenes earn a lower rating than violence and they are going to want EVERYBODY to go see it.

Anyway, I should be mellow in no time now that I've got all that off my chest. I'm listening to 'Building a Mystery' by Sarah McLachlan, so it's chilling me out. You know - no matter what happens in the careful little artistic world I build for myself and no matter what artists step into my favour and out again *sigh* At least there's always Xellos - my ultimate muse - beautiful - flirtatious - cruel - calculating - the perfect trickster. Ah - I love him. There are some characters who don't disappoint ... even at the end of 'Try' (which was perfect crap - except for him). I guess I'm just bummed because I can't like Edward anymore. Maybe it's because I was expecting a vampire and got a teen heart throb instead. I just like to call things by their right names.