Wild Moon Swings

Thursday, January 19, 2006

The Birthday of Blue Butterflies


I think this blog has sorta declined in quality of late, which is really too bad, but I guess it proves that I have a lot of junk rolling around in my little head. Too much junk to always come up with gold to write about in here. We'll just pretend that I save it all for my 'real' writing projects (as if I have any).

So, it was my birthday this week and I received as presents two blue butterflies from two different people. It's nice to know that my family know me well enough to know exactly what I want. Both of them are enchanting.

Lately, my life has been going through a metamorphosis, if you will (try to think of my butterfly analogy if you can - not necessarily about parenthood, but regarding adulthood - I'll expound on it as I go). I've felt that I have been an adult since I was about 15, and could handle everything. I thought that once you could make decisions for yourself without asking your parents, you were basically there. And being an adult isn't about making good decisions either. I think being an adult is about having the will to make choices, whether bad or good, and being prepared to take the consequences for them.
But lately, I'm realizing that my concept of adulthood is flawed.

I think that I'm not exactly wrong with my theory about choices, but that that's not really the essence of adulthood, but rather the first step. Imagine you're a little larva (a child) and you're spinning your tiny cacoon around you to protect you from everything until you're ready to break free and fly away from its safety to launch yourself into the world. You fly away a strong, lovely, capable little winged creature (a baby adult) into the big shiny world. So, departing hence, you come across the troubles that everyone will have: employment, parenthood, car ownership, home ownership, the problem of feeding your young, and on and on. Of course real butterflies don't have these problems, they die after like ... what? A year?

I think as we gain experience on how to handle more problems and more complex problems, we free more of our little butterflies, until we're a whole herd of little happy winged creatures. We perfect our current skills to make room for new ones, until we know all our minions (skills) by name and can move forward with strength and ease. Granted, it's probably not a very good analogy after all, but I'm sitting here thinking of all the excess responsiblities I've taken on since setting sail as a chipper 18 year old, and there are a lot of them. There are so many I'm starting to get tired ... and I just had my quarter life crisis, so now how am I gonna cope?

I figure I'm due for another butterfly unleashing.

1 Comments:

  • Happy Belated Birthday.
    --Shavaineth

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:32 a.m.  

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